Settling in and saying no

We've had about 18 months to settle in to our new home. And this winter it finally is starting to calm down and feel like 'normal.' This is the first time that at the two year mark, we are not preparing to leave a place. So it's nice. Instead of looking for new childcare, new place to live, new jobs...we are thinking about preschool for Egan in a year or so, starting to think about a renovation for a mud room, and establishing work routines.

We have really been welcomed by our new communities. Work is very supportive, and in spite of all the budget challenges, we feel pretty stable. Our neighbors remain wonderful, though we see much less of each other on these snowy winter days. This summer we started going to a local Shabbos, hosted every friday night by a family with a daughter in Elena's class. Here we have found new friends, both faculty and community, that have been amazing. We have settled in at our new church - and though we still miss our morning two block walk to the classed in New River Valley UU Congregation...we don't mind the drive to Reading to one of the original UU churches. I've been helping with the auction committee and Jake volunteers in the nursery.

All of this settling in has lead to some saying no. Especially in the last week. Last Sunday at church, the president asked me to consider running for the board. Sunday evening, when we were at a dinner in town, I met the mayor of Kutztown. Upon learning that we lived on the 'south-side' she and Kurt (work friend) joking tried to convince Jake or I to run for town council because they need more people from our side of town. (I know you are probably thinking what I was 'Kutztown has sides?') Then today, Andy Arnold (host along with his wife Arabel of weekly Shabbos and candidate for the 'north side' council seat) tried to convince me to run for school board. I'm flattered that people think of us (even if it just because of where we happened to buy a house) and a little amazed that we can be so settled as to be cajoled into running for local offices in only 18 months. Then again, there are a lot of really old people in town who aren't going to run for office! During these times, I call upon the 'angel' on my shoulder, a working mom mentor I've had for a long time, Cathryn Harbor - wife of our undergraduate advisor Dave Harbor and amazing doctor (the medical, not rock, kind). They have three amazing kids - all of whom I used to babysit when I was in college. But I digress. Cathryn told me that when you have kids and two full time careers you get to do one (maybe two when they get older) 'extra' things. She said, 'I'm not on the PTA, I don't run races to cure cancer, I don't teach Sunday School or coach soccer. My 'one' thing is taking care of myself, I eat well and exercise. When you are a working mom, you only get one thing. Pick it, and say no to everything else.' So when someone asks me to run for school board (or heck coordinate the school carnival) Cathryn appears on my shoulder and whispers in my ear. I have to ask myself - is this more important that my 'one' thing? You might ask, what is my 'one' thing? Well, right now mine is working out. A 4 days a week at the gym when I get up at 6:05 am and can get home by 7:15. The other two days I do yoga in my office with my window covered. (Jake is pigeons of course!) So is the school board more important than my workout? Right now, no. I have to say no. I have to take care of myself. But maybe some day I'll work up to 'two' things - then maybe I can consider something important like church board, town counsel, or school board. And I like thinking that we now live in a place where I have this to consider.